The Patient Sikh: Part Fourteen--The Telephone
This an excerpt from a novel in progress and a work of fiction. So I waited there, in silence as the phone rang. I still couldn't believe I was calling Sonny after all that has happened. I hadn't even rehearsed what I would say. The phone rang a third time, I heard a scruffy voice say "Hello." Who is this? Sonny lives with his sister, and her husband doesn't sound anything like this. I'm very good at recognizing voices. I or so I thought."Hello! Who is this?" the voice asked. Oh my god."Dad?" What was he doing at Sonny's house? Oh my god, I called my house instead of his house."Yasmine, how are you? Is there something wrong with the connection?" He was slurring his words. He was drunk, as usual. Why was I even surprised? I would be surprised if he wasn't."Dad I'm sorry I called you by mistake," I said and sighed. "I have to go, Dad, I'm sorry.""OK, Yasmine," he whispered.I hung up the phone. I stared at myself again in the mirror by the dresser. My ass is big and my breasts are not big enough. The hell with it. I'll call him anyways.I dialed Sonny's number this time. It rang twice and then someone picked up, "Hello?" the voice said in a squeaky tone. It was his little nephew. "Is Sonny there?" I asked and stared at the tiny paint holes on the wall.I didn't say hi to his nephew even though I knew the kid. "Hold on one second," he said and I waited. Still had no plan."Hi Sonny, it's Yasmine," I stated without any emotion."Oh hey, what's up?" he chirped, he seemed happy. Was he happy to hear from me?"Nothing, I was just hanging out and I thought I'd call you." And I love you and you know it and that is why everything is."Cool. I was just studying for my physics test," he said in a very nonchalant tone."Oh am I bothering you?" I asked because I didn't know what else to say."No, not at all, I was looking for a distraction." I could hear the smile on his face. The beautiful smile. Those teeth, I sat there in a silence for a moment thinking about his teeth. He never had braces but they were so straight."How are things going?" I asked, not sure if I wanted to know how happy he was with his new girlfriend."Alright, things are alright," he spoke with such ease and I didn't. I exactly did not speak with ease. Don't you miss me, Sonny? "What's going on with you?" What's going on, nothing, I'm dying, that's what's happening. I suppose we all are, but I'm doing it quicker at the moment."Good," I sighed. I realized that we were not going to talk about the elephant in the room. The fact that I told him that I'm in love with him. The fact that he has a woman that he probably loves in his life. All I want to know is if you love her.
We finished the rest of the conversation awkwardly. We no longer had that ease of conversation, at least I didn't. He seemed as laid back as usual. I was the nervous one, the one who was holding back. Is it over? Is our friendship over? Can we be friends if we are like this?I sat and stared at my Women's Study coursepack that I had been reading before I called him. Screw men, I don't understand them and am not even sure why I like them. This is how I know homosexuality is biological because I don't want to like men, my body forces me to.I walked across the room to see if this girl I just recently met, Jane, was in her room. I liked her because she thought I was wise, she once said. She didn't know how stupid I am. How dumb I feel. I can't seem to pass my Statistics class and I can't get a hold of my emotions for a guy who is unavailable.It's the story of my life. I always liked boys who were not in my league, that were wrong for me. I was in love with this very popular guy on the soccer team. I loved to watch him play. But he didn't know I existed, and maybe I thrived on that. Maybe that is what's wrong with me.I knocked on Jane's door. She opened and smiled, her soft brown hair shorter than before. "Did you get a haircut?" I asked."Yeah, you like it?" she asked."Yeah, it suits you," I said and walked into her small dorm room. Her room was smaller than mine for some reason. Through her window, you could see a very pretty picture of the University of Michigan campus. I wonder how I got into such a good school.Me and Jane often had very philosophical and meaningful conversations. I could trust her to understand a part of me I didn't share with everyone. I didn't talk about Sonny or my alcoholic father. I could just be the intellectual me, the one that looked at life as if it were an essay, and I had to prove a thesis."Do you think it's necessary in life to be with the love of your life?" I asked as I took a sip of lemon tea that she made for me. We sat on her small bed."Do you really think there is the one? The one person that you are meant to be with?" she asked and stirred her tea."I don't know, maybe there is a one, maybe there is no one.""We are so young, there are going to be so many people that come into our lives. We don't know who the one is or what the one is, but I think we will know when we see it," Jane smiled as she said this."I think I'm in love with this guy, but I'm not sure I even know what love is," I replied."Than it may not be love. Love takes time, love takes work, it isn't just an instant feeling you get for someone.""So I take it you don't believe in love at first sight?" I asked."Not really no. I think real love can only happen when you really know someone. You don't know them the second you meet them. You may not even know them after years of living with them. Knowing someone and being with someone are two different things," she said and stared right into my eyes.I guess she was the wise one. What do I know about love? What I do know about anything? I can't even figure out a Statistics problem much less solve my own personal problems.All I know is even though we talked about nothing today, talking to Sonny is the best part of my life.ninaIf you would like to read the beginning of this novel in progress, The Patient Sikh, visit the following links in chronological order:The Patient Sikh: Part OneThe Patient Sikh: Part Two–The Wonder YearsThe Patient Sikh: Part Three–SonnyThe Patient Sikh: Part Four–Song LyricsThe Patient Sikh: Part Five–Your SongThe Patient Sikh: Part Six–Coffee Talk
The Patient Sikh: Part Eight--Kiss And TellThe Patient Sikh: Part Nine--Street ChessThe Patient Sikh: Part Ten--RaviThe Patient Sikh: Part Eleven--UnderstandingThe Patient Sikh: Part Twelve--Hey Jealousy The Patient Sikh Part Thirteen--Me