Manic Monday Part II
I don’t want to write today. I’m tired, I had a very good weekend with my best friend coming into town and now I’m just tired. I was going to skip a day, but I haven’t been writing on the weekends lately either. I don’t want to get into bad habits. I don’t want to stop writing on this blog on a daily basis.
I didn’t want to come into work either, but there was no legitimate excuse for me to take a day off. I need some more sleep and I need to just sit on my ass for a minute and do nothing. I don’t want to do anything much today.
I think everyone has those days where you don’t want to do anything productive. But I spent the whole weekend having fun, so I don’t feel like I get a pass today. Even though I just took a break from writing this to order a lipstick on Amazon. What? I don’t have any lavender lipsticks.
Then I just stopped again to make plans for the weekend. I mean if I don’t do that, what will I do all weekend? Work? Don’t be crazy.
Working right now seems crazy to me. So does eating healthy, since I kind of broke my diet a little this weekend and all of a sudden I want a sugary or carb filled snack. But I’m not gonna do it, I’m drinking my protein shake like a good girl. And in reality, it is filling me up and I no longer feel like eating junk.
But that doesn’t change the fact that I don’t want to do any real work. I really want to stare into space and sit around, maybe watch some TV. I don’t have the energy to think profound thoughts or come up with fascinating words in an order that is pleasing to the reader.
I really truly want to take a nap right here at this table. I’m also slightly bored while feeling exhausted. I know I’m a spoiled brat. I had a great weekend and now it’s time to work. But is it just me, or is it so hard sometimes to start this train back up again?
We humans are like these machines, and if you don’t run us for a while, it’s hard to start running again. Inertia is a real factor in life. A body at rest tends to remain at rest. A body in motion tends to remain in motion. I feel like I was in social motion, but not in work motion all weekend and now I’m just tired of it all. I was going to go to a movie with a friend tonight but I don’t feel up to it. And going to a movie is not a very active thing to do.
I’m not too tired, however, to shop online or mindlessly browse through Facebook. The big question of the day is: do I go home and take a nap or just power through and go to sleep early? I don’t know what to do with myself at this moment. I should be thinking of ways of making myself and my writing better. I should be thinking of clever things to say and write and be.
But I don’t have the energy to be clever right now.
It takes a lot of energy to live, do you ever notice that? I’m not saying I don’t have the energy to live, I’m just saying, sometimes I feel drained like I have nothing left to give of myself.
I feel like a zombie going through the motions at the moment. I have this feeling many people feel this way on Monday. I want to veg out, and hang out, with myself. I need to be alone and I need some kind of relaxation. I had to teach this kid some math I am not familiar with, it was a mess. I messed up, but then time ran out, luckily.
I tried on two different shirts this morning, one of them kind of fit me, but it was a little tight, and then I smeared make up all over it. Then I broke the necklace I was going to wear. Then I tried on another shirt that did not fit me. So finally I found a top that I know fit.
I’m a little cranky, a little annoyed, kind of cold. My allergies were acting up last night and this morning. I’ve been staring into space quite a bit today.
I’m really not that interesting today, sorry about that.
How’s your Monday going?
nina